Hatewatch With Us: A Variety Show for Sarcastic People

Pilot Palooza 2018

February 4th, 2019  |  1 hr 26 mins

abc, charity crossfit, coldplay, fix you, glow, hatewatch, hatewatch with us, jane the virgin, killing eve, last man standing, media, nbc, netflix, new amsterdam, outlander, pilots, podcast, sam heughan, sharp objects, starz, streaming, television, thought bubble, thought bubble audio, timeless, tv, vida

It's that time of year where we look at the television landscape, put on our best White Savior Doctor lab coats and say, "How can I help?" We entered our third Pilot Palooza with a lot of hopes and dreams, and as it turned out nothing was our shit. After getting our squirrel on with this year's batch of shows, we may just need a montage to Coldplay's Fix You, a time machine, or a collection of tiny boxes which spark joy. We watched New Amsterdam, Timeless, Glow, Sharp Objects, Vida, Killing Eve, and checked in briefly with Last Man Standing, play a quick round of Hot Or Tall, talk about a lot of other shows we would have rather been watching that weren't on the list, and nominate this year's Downward Dog because as always our heros have failed us. Let us know if there are any pilots we missed in 2018, and let us know throughout 2019 what shows you'll want us to watch! If you liked Pilot Palooza you still have two more weeks to enter us in the Sam Heughan Charity Crossfit Contest!: https://www.omaze.com/experiences/sam-heughan-date-night

Bind Off: Outlander Season 4

January 27th, 2019  |  53 mins 34 secs

bind off, brianna randall, catriona balfe, claire fraser, frasers ridge, hatewatch, hatewatch with us, jamie fraser, john bell, lord john gray, mathew b roberts, outlander, outlander recap, outlander season 4, podcast, roger, sam heughan, starz, streaming, television, thought bubble, thought bubble audio, thunderpants, tv

Like the mustache on a young hero's face or the thunder in one's pants, we have arrived once again at the end of another season of Outlander. Join us as we trade our gloats and gripes for the season and try to come to terms with challenging ideas such as actual human emotions, facial expressions, drawing, and sad tent sex. Joy was sparked, rage was raged, and the Strong Sexual Content was the Actually Just Normal Feelings We Felt About Sam Heughan's Face along the way. If you want to see us follow up on the very important Outlander thesis presented in this episode, enter us in the Sam Heughan Charity Crossfit Contest this holiday season: https://www.omaze.com/experiences/sam-heughan-date-night

Pilot Palooza coming next week, we swear!

Pride, Prejudice, and Mistletoe and A Shoe Addict's Christmas

December 11th, 2018  |  1 hr 38 secs

a christmas carol, a shoe addict's christmas, candace cameron bure, christmas, christmas movies, erhmerhgerhd, hallmark, hallmark christmas, hatewatch, hatewatch with us, jean smart, memes, movies, outlander, photography, podcast, pride and prejudice, pride prejudice and mistletoe, sam heughan, television, thought bubble, thought bubble audio, tv, tv movies

It's our last installment of Hatewatch Hallmark before moving on to the endless bounty of off-brand Christmas movies, so we are coming in hot this week. We start with the sequel to our Outlander Store Dot Com special: A Novice's Guide to Destiny Dice and honestly we feel this should have been its own segment because it had way more to offer than either of the films we watched. We then move on to Pride, Prejudice, and Mistletoe where we had a lot of questions about our stock options next fiscal year. Before long we are visited by the Ghost of Jean Smart Past, Future, and Present, and were transported to A Shoe Addict's Christmas where Kelsey bestowed upon us the gift of her Candance impression and ERHMERHGERD did we dig up an old ass meme. If you too would like to redo your past in answer to your calling from God by your guardian angel Jean Smart, enter us in the Sam Heughan Charity Crossfit Contest this holiday season: https://www.omaze.com/experiences/sam-heughan-date-night

Road to Christmas and Christmas In Evergreen: Letters to Santa

December 4th, 2018  |  1 hr 23 secs

chad michael murray, charity crossfit, christmas, christmas in evergreen, christmas in evergreen letters to santa, christmas movie, hallmark, hallmark channel, hallmark christmas, hatewatch, hatewatch hallmark, hatewatch with us, movie, podcast, road to christmas, sam heughan, santa, tv, vermont

It's #HatewatchHallmark Vermont week! We watch Road to Christmas, where Kirstie learns how to identify a Chad Michael Murray in the wild, then it's like Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again! all over again as we revisit our favorite town with an inexplicable Christmas theme in Christmas in Evergreen: Letters to Santa. Ok, it's not quite as good as Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again!, but what could be? We chat about the specific boundaries we want Hallmark to push, Kirstie references male romantic leads as "the guy... the love guy," and we even get some good old fashioned tchotchke ponzi schemes. If you're reading this, Santa, consider this our letter, and enter us in the Sam Heughan Charity Crossfit Contest this holiday season: https://www.omaze.com/experiences/sam-heughan-date-night

Christmas At Pemberley Manor and Princess Switch

November 27th, 2018  |  1 hr 23 mins

aldovia, bingo, book adaptation, christmas movie, crossfit, eurovision, film, genovia, hallmark, hallmark christmas, hatewatch, hatewatch with us, jane austin, meredith blake, movie, netflix, netflix original, parent trap, pemberley manor, podcast, pride and prejudice, princess switch, sam heughan, thought bubble, thought bubble audio, tv, tv movie

Its the most wonderful time of the year, #HatewatchHallmark 2018! We are kicking off the season with Hallmark's Christmas at Pemberley Manor with a breakdown of Hallmark's many adaptive failures of classic literature, a few jokes at the expense of Gen Z, and plenty of printed emails. Then we move on to our favorite segment-within-a-segment with Netflix, What Have You Done? This time, Netflix has done A Princess Switch (formerly a Christmas Switch), and we travel to Belgragenovaldovia to shout about identity theft, transference, pureeing fruit, and bad accents. Come for the Parent Trap references, stay for the Generic Fictional European Country Eurovision Team draft picks. Also, if you like the show, don't forget to enter us in the Sam Heughan Charity Crossfit Contest! 25 entries will start a printed-email letter writing campaign to Hallmark and/or the creation of the Generic Fictional European Country Name Generator! Enter us here: https://www.omaze.com/experiences/sam-heughan-date-night

Mamma Mia, Here We Go [Again]

November 2nd, 2018  |  1 hr 9 mins

colin firth, film, greece, hatewatch, hatewatch with us, mamma mia, mamma mia 2, mamma mia here i go again, meryl streep, movie, musical, outlander, pierce brosnan, podcast, sam heughan, thought bubble, thought bubble audio

Today we bestow upon you multiple surprises! First, it's a surprise midweek episode! Consider this a peace offering for being late on our regular episode this week. We are bringing you the truest spirit of Hatewatch with both of the Mamma Mia movies! The love Pierce Brosnan gave us, nothing else can save us SOS. We were defeated, Mamma Mia won the war. Wine coolers, Greek vacations, all three of our hot dads, My My, how could we resist ya? Then, we're having the time of our lives with our super secret super extra bonus content, The Outlander Episode Podcast Within An Episode! For this very special bonus content, we are filling you in on some important Sam Heughan news in the lead up to Outlander's new season on Sunday. Watch that scene, digging these podcast queens [with financial support in the form of contest entires????]
If you enjoyed this episode/the show, please enter us in the Sam Heughan Charity Crossfit Contest!: https://www.omaze.com/experiences/sam-heughan-date-night

American Girl Stories: Ivy and Melody

October 31st, 2018  |  50 mins 52 secs

addy, amazon, american girl, american girl doll, canada, children movies, civil rights, content, felicity, hatewatch, hatewatch with us, ivy, josephine, julie, logan, media, melody, molly, movies, podcast, samantha, streaming, thought bubble, thought bubble audio

This Halloween we bring you only the spoo000o0o0o0o0o0o00kiest content: an episode a week late, more American Girl movies, and yet another installment of Listen to Kirstie and Kelsey Look at the Internet! We BYOB'd our American Girl stories and learned about gymnastics, civil rights, and ourselves. Discover important changes to the American Girl branding and line up, and don't forget to tell us YOUR American Girl Story!

Hallmark Christmas Preview and Little Italy

October 16th, 2018  |  1 hr 3 mins

candace cameron-bure, christmas in evergreen, christmas movies, emma roberts, film, gingerbread romance, google, hallmark, hallmark christmas, hatewatch, hatewatch with us, hayden christianson, lacey chabert, letters to santa, little italy, made for tv movies, media, movie, podcast, reviews, sand, streaming, television, thought bubble, thought bubble audio, vermont

This week's episode is a testiment to women who have it all and the compromises they have to make, such as finding the time to record an entire episode in one sitting. In our first recording session we bring you your favorite segment, Listen to Kirstie and Kelsey Google, and react in real time to the 2018 Hallmark Christmas movie lineup. There are several hot titles we're looking forward to including apperances from at least one Candace. In our second recording, we bring you the Film That Was promised: Little Italy. We beg you, do not watch this movie but do listen to this segment because we've got bespoke rooftop garden lamps, organic pizza dreams, taking shots while playing sexy rain soccer, wet armpit make outs, The Best Pizza Competition, and lots of premade dough. We may not have it all together, but together we have it all.

Hatewatch Holiday: COLUMBUS DAY 2018

October 9th, 2018  |  1 hr 10 mins

1492 productions, 1995, chris columbus, christopher columbus, columbus day, films, harry potter, harry potter and the chamber of secrets, harry potter and the sorcerers stone, hatewatch, hatewatch holiday, hatewatch with us, hugh grant, julianne moore, movies, nine months, podcast, romcom, thought bubble, thought bubble audio

It's time for one of our favorite Hatewatch Holidays: Christopher Columbus Day! We carry on the Hatewatch tradition of spending some time with the first two Harry Potter films. This year it's Chamber of Secrets and while we have a lot of gripes about the adaptive choices Chris Columbus made, it turned out we had a lot of gripes with JK Rowling, Ginny Weasley, and the romcoms our generation was promised. Then we discuss the 1995 film Nine Months, a nice and accidental tie in from recent events from Hatewatch Nation. Chris Columbus gets back on his bullshit, Hugh Grant is a dweeb, and y'all get the birth story you never asked for. After all, the big childbirth scene is every actresses dream??? The plot really thickens when we find cause to give thanks to Chris Columbus, which brings a whole new meaning to Columbus Day.

Return from Hiatus and Netflix, What Have You Done?

October 2nd, 2018  |  57 mins 5 secs

bobs burgers, brooklyn 99, brooklyn nine-nine, cheers, cw, ever wood, film, friends, hatewatch, hatewatch with us, hulu, movies, netflix, podcast, romcom, streaming, television, thought bubble, thought bubble audio, to all the boys i've loved before, tv, wings

This week we are taking you through the hole in the fabric of space-time, back 5 weeks to our first attempt at returning from hiatus. It was a simpler time when Kirstie was getting a lot less sleep and watching a lot more TV, and Kelsey was living her best RomCom life. First we discussed all the TV Kirstie watched on maternity leave, including the gringiness of 90s sitcoms, the argument for the 30 minute sitcom as a format, and Kirstie admitting she was right to lose the great Brooklyn 99 Fight of 2018. Then we have a rare opportunity to put a positive spin on everyone's favorite segment, Netflix, What Have You Done? With a pep in our step and sheer delight in our mics, we review the Netflix RomCom To All The Boys I loved Before, as well as praising the platform for their contributions to the RomCom Renaissance. For the second week in a row, we're glad to be back!