A Castle for Christmas and Christmas at Castle Hart

January 3rd, 2022  |  49 mins 26 secs

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This episode was meant to be your Christmas week content but new year same us so we're ushering 2022 with the last of our Hatewatch Holidays 2021 content. We've got face blindness, knitting vigilantes, and a brief visit from our best Hallmark friend Lacey. Stay tuned for our favorite new year traditions, Awards and Pilot Palooza!

Nine Kittens of Christmas and Next Stop Christmas

December 20th, 2021  |  1 hr 4 mins

cats, christmas, christmas movie, hallmark, hallmark christmas, hallmark christmas movie, hatewatch with us, kittens, next stop christmas, nine kittens of christmas, television, thought bubble audio, time travel, trains, tv, tv review, tv reviews

It's the most Hatewatchable Time of the Year - Hatewatch Christmas 2021 is well underway and this week we are coming in hot with two entries from Hallmark full of time travel, cats, and infrastructure galore. First it's the Nine Kittens of Christmas, a movie where not much happens except a venue for our annual debate about the merits of Hallmark fucking. Next is Next Stop Christmas, and folks Hallmark had no right making this film just for us. If you like trains, time travel, and dunking on New England this has got it all.

SAS: Red Notice (Our Month on the Rails)

April 27th, 2021  |  45 mins 16 secs

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Grab your tobbogans and your gas masks folks because we're boarding a train to a whole new world of trains and infrastructure. The good news, we've found the intersection of our brand containing both Trains and Sam Heughan, the bad news, it's Action Hallmark. It's always Christmas, the good guy always wins, and there's always bombs on trains. We are heart broken to be winding down Our Month on the Rails, but we are so grateful you joined us all for the ride.

Christmas in Evergreen and the 12th Date of Christmas

December 24th, 2020  |  1 hr 3 mins

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What would Christmas be without revisiting our favorite places? We are returning reluctantly to Evergreen, Vermont, where we can apparently no longer see the North Pole, nor partake in magical advent calanders, but do apparently have plenty of hat factory ghosts, before we jet off to Chicago for a scavenger hunt inspired stay-cation. Tl:dr, we want Hallmark to do more weird townie shit and fewer start-up marketing stunts. Stay tuned for the end when we draft our pilots for Pilot Palooza!! Make sure to make your list and do your homework!

A Treat for Christmas: The Christmas House and Christmas on the Square

December 3rd, 2020  |  1 hr 11 mins

christine baranski, christmas movies, christmas on the square, dolly parton, hallmark, hallmark christmas, hallmark original movie, hatewatch, hatewatch holidays, hatewatch with us, netflix, netflix christmas, the christmas house, thought bubble audio, treat williams, tv movies

Get your holiday lights and music display kits ready because it's finally time for Hatewatch Holidays 2020! We're kicking off the festivities with A Treat for Christmas... A Christmas Treat... Christmas for Treat... Treatmas? Whatever you want to call it, the important thing here is that our Treat Dad Treat Williams is in not one but two holiday films this year. After a lengthy discussion about the user experiences of streaming services that end in Plus, we're off to the races with The Christmas House, Hallmark's first endeavor to win over the gays. Honestly, it's not as bad as we thought it would be, despite some dicey plot choices (looking at you, fixer-upper on the Hudson). It's another story altogether for Christmas on the Square, arguably the biggest disappointment of our holiday movie season. We're gonna commission an episode of Handsome Justice to investigate the claim of whether angels can fly because they take themselves lightly and also why this movie is so bad. Stay tuned for several more Hatewatch Holidays installments coming soon!

Falling for Vermont and Raffi

October 17th, 2020  |  1 hr 7 mins

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Technically, we're here to talk about the fine Hallmark original film Falling for Vermont. Do we cover the movie? Sure. Do we spend more time talking about the degrees to which Raffi bones? PERHAPS.

Animal Crossing: Friendship Island

August 27th, 2020  |  39 mins 35 secs

animal crossing, animal crossing new horizons, bubble productions, dogs, friendship, hallmark, hallmark channel, hallmark christmas, hallmark movies, hatewatch with us, james middleton, nintendo, nintendo switch, switch, the dog house uk, thought bubble audio, tom nook, treat williams, turnips, video games

We're back from our impromptu hiatus, which means we have an episode that's a little bit sloppy but mostly just friendship. We kick off with what's sure to be an award-winning pitch for Hallmark Channel this holiday season (spoilers: it involves a royal sibling, dogs, and bikes). Then, Kirstie has huge news to share, which leads to a discussion of Animal Crossing: New Horizons, known to this podcast as FRIENDSHIP ISLAND. We're very excited to be able to virtually hang out again, on this podcast and on Friendship Island, and if you are too, please give us a 5-star review!

Meghan Markle, Hallmark Star

July 15th, 2020  |  54 mins 5 secs

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It was the week that we learned Meghan Markle starred in not one but TWO Hallmark movies! You heard that right folks, we're discussing When Sparks Fly and Dater's Handbook, two fine films that feature Meghan Markle, relatable video conferencing, and men who do the very least. We've got hot takes on Meghan's acting chops, her Hallmark hair journey, and the intracacies of Fourth of July wedding attire. If you, too, feel like you are stuck in a dead-end job making bad tv movies, just hold out hope that a year from now you will meet a dashing prince and get married and then divorce the royal family and live happily ever after because that is a much better story than the plots of either of these movies. THE END!

If you enjoyed this, we think Meghan would want you to join us in donating and learning how you can help at the following links: https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/# https://secure.actblue.com/donate/bail_funds_george_floyd?refcode=cwg

William & Kate: The Movie(s)

April 9th, 2020  |  1 hr 45 mins

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What happens when you come to recording night to discuss one film, but the universe delivers you a different mission? Is it destiny? Kind of like when you arrive to your first day of university and you bump into your future wife, who happens to have a life size poster of you on her wall? Today at Hatewatch, we are here to discuss the age-old questions, Who are they? and What is this?, as we watch not one but two(!) made for TV movies about the love story of Prince William & Kate Middleton. This episode features all of your favorites, including Kirstie and Kelsey Google A Thing, Hot or Tall, and requisite judgment towards Some Members of the Royal Family. If you know who any of these people are, please let us know via a review or tweet us at @hatewatchwithus!

A Christmas Prince 3: The Royal Baby and Christmas in Rome

December 24th, 2019  |  1 hr 8 mins

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We're taking a Christmas journey to two Europes, both of which are based in a reality so otherworldly, Candace Cameron-Bure remains our only tether to life here on Earth. First, we journey to Rome to catch up with our old friend Lacey in the Hallmark Original, Christmas in Rome. It's another Christmas, and another jockish businessman who only knows spreadsheets and overtime, but luckily Lacey is there to help him knead bread, however questionable the technique. Then we head to Aldovia to reunite with Queen Amber, in A Christmas Prince 3: The Trilogy We Never Asked For. I'm sorry, :The Royal Baby. We're bringing the hot takes on birth plans, contractions, paint rollers, feminism, and the naming conventions of fictional countries. With the Hatewatch Holidays winding down, it's time to start looking ahead to two of our favorite annual traditions, The Really Fucking Good Television Award Show For Nice People Only, and Pilot Palooza. Send us your suggestions!