Hatewatch With Us: A Variety Show for Sarcastic People

77. Pride Prejudice and Mistletoe and A Shoe Addicts Christmas

December 11th, 2018  |  1 hr 38 secs

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It's our last installment of Hatewatch Hallmark before moving on to the endless bounty of off-brand Christmas movies, so we are coming in hot this week. We start with the sequel to our Outlander Store Dot Com special: A Novice's Guide to Destiny Dice and honestly we feel this should have been its own segment because it had way more to offer than either of the films we watched. We then move on to Pride Prejudice and Mistletoe where we had a lot of questions about our stock options next fiscal year. Before long we are visited by the Ghost of Jean Smart Past, Future, and Present, and were transported to A Shoe Addicts Christmas where Kelsey bestowed upon us the gift of her Candance impression and ERHMERHGERD did we dig up an old ass meme. If you too would like to redo your past in answer to your calling from God by Jean Smart, your guardian angel, enter us in the Sam Heughan Charity Crossfit Contest this holiday season: https://www.omaze.com/experiences/sam-heughan-date-night

76. Road to Christmas and Christmas In Evergreen: Letters to Santa

December 4th, 2018  |  1 hr 23 secs

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It's #HatewatchHallmark Vermont week! We watch Road to Christmas, where Kirstie learns how to identify a Chad Michael Murray in the wild, then it's like Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again! all over again as we revisit our favorite town with an inexplicable Christmas theme in Christmas in Evergreen: Letters to Santa. Ok, it's not quite as good as Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again!, but what could be? We chat about the specific boundaries we want Hallmark to push, Kirstie references male romantic leads as "the guy... the love guy," and we even get some good old fashioned tchotchke ponzi schemes. If you're reading this, Santa, consider this our letter, and enter us in the Sam Heughan Charity Crossfit Contest this holiday season: https://www.omaze.com/experiences/sam-heughan-date-night

75. Christmas At Pemberley Manor and Princess Switch

November 27th, 2018  |  1 hr 23 mins

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Its the most wonderful time of the year, #HatewatchHallmark 2018! We are kicking off the season with Hallmark's Christmas at Pemberley Manor with a breakdown of Hallmark's many adaptive failures of classic literature, a few jokes at the expense of Gen Z, and plenty of printed emails. Then we move on to our favorite segment-within-a-segment with Netflix, What Have You Done? This time, Netflix has done A Princess Switch (formerly a Christmas Switch), and we travel to Belgragenovaldovia to shout about identity theft, transference, pureeing fruit, and bad accents. Come for the Parent Trap references, stay for the Generic Fictional European Country Eurovision Team draft picks. Also, if you like the show, don't forget to enter us in the Sam Heughan Charity Crossfit Contest! 25 entries will start a printed-email letter writing campaign to Hallmark and/or the creation of the Generic Fictional European Country Name Generator! Enter us here: https://www.omaze.com/experiences/sam-heughan-date-night

73. Bind Off: Outlander

November 8th, 2018  |  48 mins 18 secs

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Droughtlander is over folks! We are binding off the season premier of Outlander and we're kicking it off with our greatest hits: Sam Heughan's tight white pants, tricorns, Starz market research, Sam Heughan market research, and heated debates about the quality of boning. We'll check in again formally at midseason, but look forward to every episode for the next 13 weeks being an Outlander episode! If you enjoyed this episode/the show, please enter us in the Sam Heughan Charity Crossfit Contest!: https://www.omaze.com/experiences/sam-heughan-date-night

68. Return from Hiatus and Netflix, What Have You Done?

October 2nd, 2018  |  57 mins 5 secs

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67. The Emmys and Ready Player One

September 24th, 2018  |  1 hr 2 mins

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59. Eurovision 2018

May 14th, 2018  |  1 hr 6 mins

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Hoist up your ship flags folks because we are #AllAboard for one of the most important Hatewatch Holiday's of the entire year, Eurovision 2018!! We came prepared with Scorecards, Bingo, non-alcoholic gummy bears, and only one mic. We provide our comprehensive recap of all the acts and the 4 hours of vote tallying. Come for the global unity, stay for the audience participation and male props.

58. Hatewatch Our Feels: Jane the Virgin

May 9th, 2018  |  1 hr 1 min

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This episode was delayed by engagements, dog bites, multiple internet outages, and a general feeling in the universe that time is meaningless. But Captain Feelings is a persistent one, and we made it through this feelings journey just for you, our dear listeners. This week we're discussing the Jane the Virgin season 4 finale, all of our feelings, and then more of our feelings. Basically, prepare to Hatewatch Our Feels because that's all we've got for you this week. Kirstie and Kelsey fight and there's rose sorbet involved. This is your official warning that EUROVISION is coming for your feeds on Tuesday!

57. Netflix, What Have You Done: When We First Met and Series of Unfortunate Events

April 24th, 2018  |  1 hr 4 mins

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The theme of this episode is Netflix, What Have You Done? But it also could have been Soda, What Have You Done? Sweet Tea, What Have You Done? IMDB Pro, What Have You Done? We BYOB two Netflix originals. Kelsey watched the Netflix Original RomCom When We First Met and her algorithms will never be the same. We learn about IMDB and all the different ways you can tag panties. Then, Kirstie reveals a shocking plot twist: Netflix, What Have You Done can have positive connotations! We discuss the Series of Unfortunate Events, Kirstie's unbridled joy over television adaptations and dark stories for children. It's a bumpy episode for Netflix, Kirstie's knowledge of actor's names, movies of the mid 2000s and our understanding of the fundamental question, Netflix, What Have You Done?

54. Outlander Omnibus: MARK ME

April 5th, 2018  |  1 hr 30 mins

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The good news about this episode is that the Outlander Omnibus is back! The bad news? We promise you two segments but only deliver on one! We promise, it’s actually kind of worth it. We’ll force our feelings upon you, talk about memorable moments and crying at TV, and shout our favorite catchphrase a whole bunch. If we failed to mention your favorite thing about Outlander, tell us at @hatewatchwithus!